Can't Use a Knife

On Mother's Day, as I was getting ready to make some delicious stuffed french toast, I pulled out the knife from the block.  Apparently it was a little too quick and the knife slid through my hand and sliced my hand pretty good.  I had to get a few stitches and my hand was bandaged up for about 2 weeks.

Anyway, one of my kindergarteners asked about how I cut my hand.  I told her the story.  She looks me in the eye and says, "I guess you aren't allowed to use knives anymore."  I guess not-- the 6 year old told me not to. 

So Is This What Differentiated Learning Is?

Last week, I was meeting with a group of my readers. It is a group of 3 girls who are quite intelligent and very inquisitive. They think deeply and love to investigate what they are reading about.

They are currently reading a book about Harriet Tubman and the Underground Railroad. On this particular day, they had read about Harriet Tubman getting married. It said something about Harriet Tubman jumping over a broom to symbolize their union as a couple. One student had written in her journal that it was confusing that they just jumped over a broom and "BAM, they were married". She was confused and wanted to learn more. So, we talked about different wedding traditions. Hannah said that she thought it mean that "two become one" as TWO people jumped over ONE broom.

I read that it was just a tradition deeply rooted in the slave culture. Hannah said she liked her idea better. FUNNY!

It gets better. Then, they said that it wasn't like weddings nowadays because now it takes about 5 days to plan a wedding and for them they just quickly decided. (HA HA- 5 days! :)) They asked how long it was taking me to plan my wedding. I told them "about a year". Deeper and deeper into the conversation we go. They said that getting married means that you have babies. They asked if I wanted to have kids. Hannah remarks that she doesn't want to have kids because it would probably hurt. I told her that there was special medicine that you can get so it makes your body numb and tingly so you don't have to feel it as much....

Then... I realized this was ALL so beyond the point. Yes, they were curious... but this conversation needed to end before they we began talking about more than I bargained for. These kids are so inquisitive how can you possibly cut them off? But, I realize... this kind of differentiation walks a fine line... YIKES!

Sleepovers

A few weeks ago, Jonny (my fiance) happened to come to class with me on Friday. As tradition goes in our classroom, we have a class meeting every Friday before my beginning track students go home. Everyone shares something they want to say. My kids went around and shared their thoughts. Jonny loves to chime in and he said that he was "excited to have a delicious breakfast with Ms. Berg". (We had plans to go to Kneaders for breakfast on Saturday. They have the most delicious french toast EVER!)

Anyway, a minute goes by and Kyle raises his hand. He says, "Why does Jonny get to sleep over at your house? You're not married." I quickly retorted, "He's not. He's staying at his sister's house."

Then, I quickly changed the subject before anymore awkward conversations arose.

What Moms Can't Do

Some of my kids were reading a book called "What Moms Can't Do" in a guided reading group yesterday. To connect to prior knowledge, I asked the kids prior to reading what types of things they thought moms couldn't do.

One of my kiddos says "When moms are pregnant, they can't repent." I asked him what he meant and he said, "Well, they just can't... I think."

It took a lot for me to hold back my giggles. But, I thought it was kind of funny. I wonder what idea actually made him think that.

2/25/08
Scene: We are in the gym for a musical assembly. The lady performing in the assembly asks the students if they know what holiday comes in April that teachers just adore... and it isn't Easter (in a sarcastic tone).
Hunter: (shouting) TEACHER APPRECIATION WEEK!
Sidenote: The presenter was talking about April 15th. Tax Day. And teacher appreciation week isn't even in April...

2/28/08
Scene: Sitting at the carpet, talking about goods and services. I asked if teachers provide goods or services. My students asked me why I wanted to be a teacher.
Me: I love kids so much. I think they are fun and they are so nice. Sometimes adults aren't as nice as kids. I laugh everyday. It's just great!
Daniel: Ms. Berg, you should get plastic surgery.
Me: (somewhat weary of delving into this topic) Why do you think that?
Daniel: Well, if you love kids so much, you could get plastic surgery to look like a kid again.
Me: Hmmm... I think I would make a tall 2nd grader.
Christian: Ms. Berg, what is plastic surgery?
Me: (Thinking: how do I answer this tactfully?) It is a surgery that can make your body look differently. For instance, someone who gets a bad burn, maybe on their face, might want plastic surgery to change the scars to smooth skin again.
Annalise: Do they use plastic to do this?
At this point, I want to end the conversation because first, they will go home and talk about it with their parents. I don't want parents wondering how plastic surgery came up in class. Second, we are SO off-topic... but gave me my good laugh for the day.

Today was the 100th day of school. As my students walked into class, saw their desks were moved around, saw their desks moved around into small stations, pandemonium fills the room. "It's HUNDREDS day..." "Whoooo-hoo! PARTY!". Now for a teacher with quite a bit of structure in the classroom, this may feel like bugs crawling under the skin. But, it is to be expected. I don't know why the 100th day of school is such a big deal, but to kids in younger grades, they seriously live for this day.

So, after the kids settle in a start their morning reading, I look over at Hunter's Day. He has a little sign for his forbidden homeless pencil shop that says OPEN taped to the side of his desk. Next to this usual sign, there is a sign that says "Happy Hundreds Day!"

The day, a little crazy continues on... the kids seemed pretty happy. There is a point in almost everyday where I am required to walk 6th graders from Music back to their classrooms. Now, this may not seem like a large task but I teach 2nd graders. When I talk, they listen. When I talk to 6th graders, most of them just keep talking. So, I decided last week that I was done having them walk all over me. I enforced the hall rule of NO TALKING. The girls are pretty good at it... the boys are another story. Today, I let the girls go. Then I let the boys ago about 5 at a time back to their class. The last group was waiting... and I asked them it they thought they could walk as quietly as the last class did. One young man said... "I can, but I am not sure these guys can. They are always talking. I guess they aren't front of the line material." It took everything for me to hold back and not die laughing.

Back to my classroom, I was having a little discussion with some kids who were counting 100 chocolate chips out. Jace says "Man, this is like going to work." "Why?" "Because it is SO hard." Then Jayden says "Yeah, well this is actually like mini-college. This is getting you ready for what you do in real college." Next time, I go to work or college, I want to count out 100 chocolate chips.

Towards the end of the day, I was reading some of their writing about what they would like to be doing when they are 100. One boy's, Tyson, says "When I am 100, I will be knocked people with my cane. I will not want them on my lawn and if they do, I will knock them out." After a good laugh, I, of course, made him change to something a bit less violent. So now he will be tapping people on their head with his cane.

Funny Things from the Past

1/9/08
A real conversation between two 2nd graders:
Anna: Lauren said she dumped you.
Hunter: Does she even know what dumped means?
Anna: Yeah, its when you get a divorce. And I dump you too.

Sometime last year during a group project:
Tameka: My mom says "love" is a big word.
Male student: No its not. It's only 4 letters... L-O-V-E.

1/14/08
After coming back from a half day meeting at the district, I pick up my kids from lunch recess. This is the conversation that took place.
Addison: Dude, Miss Berg... that sub was so cool. She let us do whatever we wanted. She said we could sit on the counters, lay under our desks, and just kind of do whatever until Track B comes in. Can you get her to come again when you leave again?
Miss Berg: (thinking) Yes, Addison. That is exactly what I will do. Throw out all of my hard work in teaching you structure so that you can do what you like...
Seriously, I wonder what these kids are thinking when they tell me stuff like this.

1/17/08
Ethan (speaking to a friend during indoor recess): Hey, did you see that video on YouTube....These are words that should never come out of a 7-year-old's mouth.